I am deathly afraid of birds and have been since I was a kid. A peacock at the Calgary Zoo is what started it all! Those damn things still wander around the zoo. I cannot stand chickens and hated having to go in the chicken coop to collect eggs. I like listening to birds, I just freak out if they come anywhere near me. Walking in a pet store takes all of my courage! No matter how many times I go near a bird they still make me cringe.
As a mom I fear for my kids. I want them to be healthy and safe for the rest of their lives. When they are not with me I fear that bad things are going to happen to them. This is probably irrational and is what being a parent is all about, but it is still a fear that I have.
The biggest fear of all that I have is that of dying. It makes me have panic attacks in the middle of the night. This has been true since I was a kid. I used to lay in bed counting how many years I have left until I hit my 80's/90's and probably won't be here anymore. The thought of no longer being here physically/mentally/emotionally and never being with the people whom I love scares the bejeezus out of me.
I attend church every once in awhile and try to believe in the whole life after death and being with our loved ones in the hereafter/heaven but I still harbor the what if..... I know and understand that death happens to everyone eventually but that does not alleviate the panic I feel. In all honesty I have never shared these thoughts with anyone before.
All I can do is focus on the positives in my life and not take anything for granted. That and maybe seek some counselling or enjoy a few stiff drinks!
What are your fears?
Thought of the day: How do you know when you're behind a tree?
Quote of the day: Don't watch the clock; do what it does. Keep going. Sam Levenson